Random Thoughts, Volume 26


Random Thoughts, Volume 26

1. I think the greatest accomplishment of my life is my marriage. I convinced the most wonderful woman in the World to devote her life to living it with me. I loved her very much and still do. She passed away some years back. It’s funny to me. though, that she made the list of the top 5 people in the World that I wanted to punch more times than anyone else. However, I’m totally convinced that, if she was still here, she would agree that it was a fantastic ride all the way.

2. I believe my second greatest accomplishment of my life would be raising my children. They are all semi-normal and worrying everyday whether they are good parents or not….just as I did. They are also busy not punching THEIR spouses. Seriously, they are great people and 98.7% of the credit for that goes to the woman that I didn’t punch.

3. Whatever I saw the other day, I said, in front of other people, “Hey, they look like Mexican jumping beans.” Then, I immediately said, “Oh, wait a minute…this is 2016 …I’m not allowed to say that anymore.”

4. What Donald Trump originally proposed was banning all immigration of Muslims until we could figure out WTF was happening. This was right after the San Bernadino thing. Do you remember what our government did right after the attacks of 9/11 ? They grounded all flights until they could figure out WTF was happening. That’s just a little food for thought, my friends.

5. Here is the joke of the day, courtesy ( or blame) of my youngest son. “How many people with Attention Deficit Disorder does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” “Hey, let’s play tennis.” Yeah, I know, we’re not allowed to offend anyone anymore. See item # 3 above. It’s still funny.

6. This isn’t my original thought but it DID occur to me as I was bowling last Tuesday night. Golf and bowling are two sports that, right after you pay to play them, your goal is to play as little of the game as possible. Think about it.

7. I saw the nightly news a couple of nights ago and there was film of a house on fire. Certainly, that’s not funny but I thought it was ironic that the house was on “Burnt House Hill Road” somewhere in Pennsylvania.

8. It’s very disappointing, after you are fully dressed, shoes and all, and you go to the bathroom to pee, maybe, 45 minutes later, and you discover that you have put your boxer shorts on backwards. It is, indeed, very disappointing.

9. I have not acquired a pistol…..yet. In my last posting, I mentioned that I was thinking about getting one. Nothing that I have seen or read since the last post has made me want to get one more. However, nothing has made me less likely to get one. I’m still on the fence.

10. The electronic billboard on Interstate 95 not too far from my house tells the current jackpot amount of the Powerball game. The word “million” is permanent on the billboard. Only the numbers can be changed electronically. The billboard currently has the jackpot amount at 999 million. There are only 3 places for the numbers. The planners never considered that it could go higher. Good luck to all of you in the drawing tonight. If you win, I urge you to donate a large part to various charities and to remember to take care of your family (you’ll hear from a LOT of them) and especially your close friends. Remember please….I AM one of your closest friends.

That’s all I have for now. As always, thanks for reading. Please feel free to return to your normally scheduled lives.


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