Random Thoughts Volume 21
1. So I’m in line to pay for a sweatshirt at the JC Penney store. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t wait because I was in a bit of a hurry but it was on sale for a really good price and I didn’t know if the sale ended today. It was a Sunday. Like I said, there was a bit of a line but there were 3 cashiers working. All 3 cashiers were waiting on a customer when I got in line. I kind of noticed, because things were taking awhile, that the customer at cashier 1 was paying for each item individually and she had, like, a whole cart full of stuff. Seriously, they rang up one item, gave her a receipt and then they moved along to the next item…and none too quickly, either. I don’t understand why they were doing this. Maybe she was using a different credit card for each item. Maybe every member of her family gave her money to get one thing and she couldn’t do the math. Whatever it was, it was strange. Cashier number 2 finished with her customer and went away….never to return. Cashier number 3 had to go find an item, probably for a price check or something. She was gone quite a while. There were two guys in line in front of me. I could tell they were related because they looked like each other and they also looked like the crazy lady being served by cashier number 1. While cashier number 3 was gone, the two guys in front of me let an old lady get in front of them. I could tell that they were related to her, too. I thought to myself, “Hey, what am I ….fuckin’ invisible?” Then I thought the three of them would go to the cashier together. Cashier #3 has returned now and is ringing the items up for her customer…none too quickly…and the body language of the old lady in the front of the line tells me that she is not gonna approach the cashier with the two guys. I was listening to my MP3 player. I take one of the ear buds out, turn around to the lady that has been in line behind me for awhile now and say “I was a teenager when I got in this line…..swear to God.” After another minute, I tell her about the crazy lady at cashier one and tell her that she has been doing this since I got in line. Then I tell her, loud enough for the two guys in front of me to hear, “And these guys just let this old lady in front of the line. I guess their time is more important than ours.” It’s finally time for cahier #3 to serve somebody and, yep, the old lady goes to the cashier, with her 6 items, by herself. Her relatives, the two guys, are still waiting. I felt like just throwing the sweatshirt at the two guys and leaving but I’m too much of a fuckin’ sweetheart to do that…..plus, I wanted the sweatshirt. I swear to God, the lady at cashier #1 was still paying for more items individually. Finally, the old lady is done and the two guys approach cashier 3 together. They are going to buy one pair of shoes. The old lady is standing by, waiting for them, by the way. The cashier tells them the price and they say it is on sale and the cashier is wrong. For some reason, cashier 3 has to log into a different register to check the price. This takes about 5 minutes. She finally finishes and tells them the price is correct as she stated before….final answer. So, the one guy takes about a minute to get another $5 out of his wallet and the other guy now produces a coupon. Cashier 3 tells them it’s no good. I don’t know why because I was still listening to music but I could tell from the conversation from the guys and the cashier shaking her head that there was an argument about the coupon. Finally, the two guys give up and the cashier rings up their shoes. At this poiint the lady behind me left, which is too bad because the guys were done and my transaction took all of 1 minute. No fuss. No mess. When I left, the lady at cashier 1 was still paying for items one at a time. She may STILL be doing it. Some of you know me. Never, ever, get in line behind me anywhere.
2. The Philadelphia Eagles played today and their quarterback, Sam Bradford threw TWO interceptions in the end zone in the FIRST QUARTER. The next time that the Eagles were about to score, the quarterback threw an incomplete pass into the end zone. Philadelphia radio announcer Mike Quick, sounding very much like Yogi Berra, said (I sear to God), ” I like where Bradford threw that ball. He threw it where nobody could get it.” I was in the car laughing my ass off. He meant, of course, that Bradford threw it where a DEFENDER couldn’t get it but it was damned funny !!!
3. When I was a kid, the carnival would come around once a year. There were freaks that you could pay 10 cents to see. I remember that one of them was “the Tattooed Man”, which was a guy with tattoos from head to toe. Another freak was the “Fat Lady, which was just an incredibly obese woman. It occurred to me today that you can see both of these acts for free every time you walk around your local mall. I don’t have anything against them, you understand. It’s just an observation.
4. According to the USA Today newspaper, gambling losses in the U. S. hit nearly $143 billion in 2014. That’s about $580 per adult. I’m proud to say that I did my share…and more !
5. That same issue of USA Today had a story about a company in Japan that is producing robots that can sense human emotions. The article didn’t explain how it could do that. It did say that the robot is a 4-foot tall humanoid robot named “Pepper.” The user’s manual contains the following warning: “Owners must not perform any sexual act” or “other indecent behavior” with the robot. The robot lacks the type of part that one normally associates with sexual activity. It is unclear why Softbank, the company that produces the robots, felt that this warning was necessary. I don’t make this stuff up. USA Today – The News Journal – Sunday, Oct. 4, 2015. You can check my facts.
6. On the off chance that I am not the last person on the planet to know this, there is a website you can go to for free radio. It’s Pandora.com. It asks you some questions about what kind of music you ‘d like to hear. I typed in “classic rock.” It then plays a song and you click the “thumbs up” icon if you like the song and it will continue playing it. If you click the “thumbs down” icon, it immediately stops that song and starts a new song. It doesn’t take long before it starts feeding you songs that you really like. Several people have told me about this over the last couple of years and I finally tried it and it’s really great so I’m sharing the information. This has been a Public Service Announcement from Bob.
7. I had a bicycle that I was going to give to my oldest son. I figured one of his kids could use it. I was going to ride it but I decided I’d rather not exercise. I’ve been trying to get around to doing it so I finally did a couple of days ago. On October 9th, I sent my son the following e-mail: “So last night, I read the owner’s manual to figure out how to lower both of the back seats in my car. I knew how to lower one of them. I figured it out and got it done. Then I got that bicycle into the car to take it to the shop. I only cut one of my fingers doing it. If you remember, the guy told me that, after riding it a few times, things would start “slipping” and they did. I only rode it twice…neither time for more than a mile. So, 2 weeks ago, I stopped in the shop and reminded the guy that he said he would “tighten things” for free. He said he would. So I just took it up to the shop and there is a sign that says “Closed Oct. 9 – 11 for our annual biking trip.” My son’s reply? “Pop died. Go to Lucky’s”
That’s all I’ve got for now. As always, thanks for reading.
Random Thoughts Volume 21