Jingle Bells



At the mall, at the mall,

real crowded today.

Where the hell did all these people

come from, anyway ?

Where’s my credit card ?

Breathing real hard.

A pain in my chest.

There’s no place to rest.

Forgot to get a tree.

God, I gotta pee.

I wonder where the restroom is

so I can take a whiz.

Oh, (refrain)

Parking ? No such thing!

Girlfriend wants a ring

Ain’t no way, no how.

Can’t afford it now.

Santa Claus is drunk

He’s had too much to drink

Little kids are asking Moms

why does Santa stink ?

Oh (refrain)

There’s a sale today

Push ’em out of the way

Get the very best price

Get people something nice

Don’t forget while you’re drinking

to do a little thinking

The reason we gather today’

is to celebrate Christ’s Birthday !

Oh (refrain)


One thought on “Jingle Bells

  1. Hi Bob it’s Brenda, I’m reading a few stories to Randy while he is relaxing from a hard days work. (lol) Thanks so much for sharing!! I’m really enjoying them


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